Thought I might just share a couple of pieces of writing I did, instead of doing assignments, as per usual. I tend to write some rather, well, depressing pieces. I love the passionate, desperate and almost violently powerful imagery, I find it rather cathartic. And if writing about how frustrating life is doesn't work, then I'll put it to music and sing it. And I wonder why I never get any actual work done....


Fear of The Nothing

The silence is more than I can bear,
Drifting, cut lose from time and space,
Drifting, ungrounded and sinking into nothing
Swallowed up by Oblivion

There is pounding, pounding inside my head,
My body shudders, wracked by the cold,
Within and without, wracked by the cold,
I am no longer in control

What recourse do I have against this unseen foe?
Oblivion beckons, what can I do,
Oblivion beckons, it digs it's hooks into me
I am powerless

Oblivion claims me it's prisoner,
I am trapped, screaming a silent scream
I am no more yet I am still, screaming a silent scream
My screams fill the void

I am no more,
Lost in The Nothing, I cease to exist
Lost in The Nothing, there is no self
The Void is everything

Toni O'Connor.


This second one is a little bit about the struggle of going from child, or should I say 'Teenager-hood', to adulthood. It can be so frustrating simply having to be accountable for oneself.


Harsh Light of Day

Ripping, clawing, grasping
I crawl from my butterfly cocoon
Into the harsh light of day, I crawl
Naked and burning

I long for the shelter of what was before
I want everything to go back to the way it was
Yet into the harsh light of day, I crawl
Naked and burning

Climbing so high up this endless ladder,
Then I fall, wishing I never started to climb at all
Yet up the ladder and into the harsh light of day, I crawl
Naked and burning

I wander through a barren land, unsure of where I'm going
Wishing I didn't have to face this journey
Yet into the wilderness and the harsh light of day, I crawl
Naked and burning

Swimming across an infinite sea, so deep my feet can't reach the bottom
Wishing my goal were so much closer,
Yet across this sea I still swim, and into the harsh light of day, I crawl
Naked and burning

I stumble blindly through a pitch-black tunnel, grazing my skin as I fall,
Wishing I'd never entered this place, wishing I didn't have to get up again,
Yet through this lightless tunnel and into the harsh light of day, I crawl
Naked and burning

Must I force my way out,
force my way through?
climb the endless ladder,
see the journey through?
Must I swim the boundless ocean, and face the darkness too?
There's a knife in my heart and I'm lying here bleeding,
Feel like I'm being dragged through life kicking and screaming
For just one second, I wish that the world would stop turning
Yet into the harsh light of day, I will crawl
Naked and burning.

Toni O'Connor.